5 tips to de-stress and turbocharge your holidays!

The holiday season is upon us and, whilst that’s exciting, it can also come with increased pressures, stresses and anxiety. Hopefully, you’re in the 38% of people that feel the festive season has a positive impact on their mental health. But you’d be forgiven if you’re one of the 26% who say that it is detrimental to their health or the 36% that go through it without any impact either way. Issues common amongst my clients are prioritising family over work, juggling different people’s needs, lack of space, historic family tensions and relationships to navigate.

As a transformational coach, my interest is not just helping you to get through this period but energising you so that this is your best holiday season ever - that you’ve strengthened your relationships, found time to recharge, and are raring to go when the new year has settled. 

Here are my top 5 tips to crush the holiday period!

1. Set a goal

I remember the look of shock on my client’s face when I told him to do this before his summer holidays. But when he returned having had his best ever break, and a month later was flying whilst his colleagues were looking for their next opportunity to escape, he thanked me for it! 

It may sound counter-intuitive to set a goal for a holiday when all you want to do is let your hair down. But seeing your holiday as a time where you switch off and don’t ‘have’ to do what’s normally being asked of you misses the opportunity to spend time investing in what you want to do and growing.

Setting a goal creates intentionality that will energise and motivate you and give you a compass for how to spend this time in a way that gets you where you want to be, even if the goal is relaxation and recharging. It moves you into action and to asking the questions that will help you realise that goal - what activities will give you rest and relaxation - a massage, walks in nature, reading, listening to music? How much time will this need? What is the feeling that you’re really trying to achieve over the next two to three weeks?

We go along with the holidays because that’s what society does without plugging ourselves in and taking advantage of the opportunity available to us. How can you be a different person three weeks from now? What do you need to do to achieve that?

Setting an intention can also be something you do as a family and will ensure that everyone gets a holiday that they want. Rather than leaving it to the morning and having a cacophony of voices screaming about how they all want to do something different!

2. Schedule ‘me’ time in your calendar

Holidays are notorious for not giving you the space that you need. That journey to and from work, the office space, getting to the gym, all the little spaces in your day that give you space can easily disappear during the holidays with different responsibilities thrust upon you. Not only might you be losing these times over the holidays but it’s  aperiod where actually you need to look after yourself even more given the stresses and pressures from family obligations.

Solution: Block out time in your calendar. If you have a partner, communicate clearly what are your needs to stay ‘above the line’ over this period and ask them what they need. Find a way to accommodate each other so that both of you feel respected and cared for.


3. Be aware of your historical role over this period and be open to change

When we were young we all  took on specific roles within our families and particularly when it comes to the holiday season. There’s the one who arranges everything, the one who’s never seen to help out, the one who criticises, the one who … you get the idea. 

What we might not appreciate is that family gatherings and different times of year can trigger those old patterns of engaging with friends and family. Take some time to notice what was your role growing up, whether it still serves you to play that role and how you can find a more relevant, fulfilling role in your family dynamic in 2022.


4. Wizard of Oz Empathy!

Do you remember that moment when the curtain is pulled back and the wizard is revealed to be a regular guy, not some awesome and magical being? 

Emotions can be a lot like the wizard. When you experience someone getting angry, upset, confrontational, remember that that is just the external projection. Really, if you can look behind that curtain you’ll see someone experiencing pain, sadness, fear. It’s safer to protect themselves behind that curtain and, whilst it doesn’t feel very pleasant, if you can see what’s behind the curtain it will help diffuse the situation and ultimately bring you closer together.


5. Do something you’ve always said no to

Everyone has reasons why they can’t do certain activities, the ones that they’ve secretly dreamed of doing but always denied themselves the opportunity. (And if you don’t have any ideas you can find online a host of great experience days and activities - whether it’s supercar driving or stargazing). Make this the year that you take a step and do something you’ve always wanted to. That activity alone will turbocharge your energy, show you that you really can do what you want, and get the creative juices flowing for the year ahead.

Don’t just fall into the holidays and wake up on the other side. Make this the start of your transformation!